Malaysian politics is a dirty, sordid and scandalous arena. Anwar Ibrahim’s recent arrest for sodomy may be the spark that ignites the powder keg that is Malaysian politics. Since his arrest, many conspiracy theories have been formulated as the Malaysian public begins to dig for the truth.
Is Anwar a closet homosexual? Did Anwar set himself up to discredit the ruling UMNO party? Or did the ruling UMNO party set up the charismatic opposition leader, in an attempt to railroad his steamrolling charge to power?
All these theories are plausible, but all of them lack one crucial element that could be the primary ingredient in this scandal; a warm, frothy cup of teh tarik.
Malaysia has always been recognized as the leading authority in teh tarik. The influence of Malaysia’s national beverage is prevalent in its society. Teh tarik-making demonstrations can be readily seen on Malaysian television.
Its influence is so prevalent that the Malaysian government sent a Malaysian into space to conduct ground-breaking research in the development of teh tarik.
“The astronaut will also paint a batik motif and make ‘teh tarik’ (‘pulled’ tea) which would be shared with his fellow astronauts,” said Agriculture and Agro-based Industry Ministry parliamentary secretary Datuk Rohani Abdul Karim. (Source: Bernama.com)
Clearly, someone in the Malaysian government really loves teh tarik.
What does this have to do with Anwar Ibrahim’s arrest?
Sending a man into space is expensive. Asiaone News claims that the trip had cost Malaysian taxpayers US $25 million. Someone in the Malaysian government really loves teh tarik.
This asinine expenditure of taxpayers’ money left the country vulnerable to soaring fuel prices and as a result, the Malaysian government was forced to raise fuel prices by 41% earlier in June.
Malaysian fuel has traditionally been subsidised heavily by the government. When taxpayers witnessed their subsidised fuel prices being launched into space with a glorified teh tarik space tourist, they understandably took offense.
In retaliation, Malaysians gave their support to Anwar Ibrahim en masse. UMNO, fearful that Anwar would seize power in a by-election, orchestrated a sodomy scandal to keep him from power. The end.
As fictitious as this blog posting may be, I think Malaysians need to carefully re-examine the quality of their leadership. In this case, teh tarik is a power symbol that epitomizes everything wrong with Malaysia.
Malaysia is still struggling to pull itself from the 3rd world conditions that have plagued it since independence. Malaysians should elect a party that is interested in genuine progress, instead of one trying to chase a magic cup of teh tarik. We’ve all seen what happens when you elect a party more interested in race politics and space tourism than education and crime. But that’s another post for another time. In the meantime, I shall say a prayer for my Malaysian counterparts every time I enjoy a cup of teh tarik.
